Walking Toward the Unknown

I had been telling my friends and Development Circle colleagues about being accepted to the Lisa Williams Advanced Mediumship Course and they had so many questions.  I found myself getting more anxious about what I’d signed up for… as I answered some of their questions with what I knew thusfar.  They asked me questions about how we’d be tested and graded and I knew that some of those things would just unfold over the weekend (as we didn’t have all the complete details).  I answered what I could, and did not want to bug Lisa Williams’ office to find out the answers to what I did not know.  Yet, the questions I did not know the answers to were many…and frankly, they made me more anxious.  How will it work?  What will you do?  How will you be tested?  What’s going to happen Saturday?  Where is she getting the public clients from?  When will you know if you passed?  I didn’t know most of these answers, so I just honed in on the one or two questions that made me really anxious and just asked Lisa Williams’ office those particular questions to try and ease my mind, or help me prepare.

I just asked her office what was making me really crazy:  When would the “Platform Readings” be (where we had to give a Spirit message to an audience member)?  What day would we be reading for the general public?

I had hoped the general public readings would be Saturday so I could get that out of the way and breathe a sigh of relief.  No such luck.  I learned they were at the very end of the workshop (oh no)!  I also learned the Platform Readings (again, where you stand in front of the audience and try to bring a Spirit loved one through for someone in the audience) were Saturday afternoon.  OK, that helped me a great deal.  Knowing when the two most stressful parts of the weekend course would occur helped me prepare on many levels.  I tried not to let all the other questions people were asking me make me overly anxious (but, alas, that wasn’t working).  I sighed and just accepted this was going to be a stressful experience — before, during, and after.  I was still thrilled at this amazing opportunity, and I knew what a big deal it was.

My way to deal with stressful situations is to just keep practicing…anyway I could. So, I did more individual readings in person.  I did more individual readings over the phone (a LOT of them).  And, I was blessed the newer Spiritualist Church would have me to give messages to groups there near the end of the service on several upcoming Wednesday and Sundays.  I was grateful for all this practice…and it was pretty tiring, too.  I was so blessed to have such encouraging friends at this time, which helped me immensely to keep moving forward and trying. I was like the ‘little engine that could’ from the childrens’ book.  I knew I had to stay positive, so I kept chugging along the track with an attitude of, “I think I can, I think I can…”  I knew from reading about the Law of Attraction I could not afford to think, “I don’t think I can…” so I pretended to think I could, over and over, day after day.